The Sympathy Note Writing a note of sympathy is often done with reluctance.  Some people are concerned that they will write the wrong thing at the wrong time and in doing so, offend the recipient in some way.  This need not be the case.  Here are several guidelines to help you write a tactful sympathy message that will offer comfort to someone who is grieving.  Consider the following:  -  Write from your heart: Be personal - mention shared happy events and memories.  Be honest - don't be reluctant to mention the cause of death.  Share your sadness -  tell those who are grieving how much the deceased meant to you and that you support them in their time of sorrow.      -  Avoid statements such as "I know how you feel." or, "It's all for the best."  In actuality, each person grieves and decides what is best for them, so no message can convey how another's loss feels.  -  Keep your message short.  Don't "chat" about personal activities.  This applies to both close and casual acquaintances.    -  A sincere message such as "we are keeping you in our thoughts and prayers" can be a good way to close your message.  Be sure and sign your full name just in case there are others with your same first name.  -  Handwrite your message to make it more personal using blue or black ink.  Use an appropriate title on the hand-addressed, matching envelope.  For example, if you're sending the card to John Doe, address the envelope to Mr. John Doe.  Be sure and write your full name in the return address on the envelope.  -  If you would like to offer some form of assistance, it's perfectly fine to mention that in the note.  However, be sure your offer is specific; such as, "During this difficult time, I would like to provide dinner for you and your family.  I'll contact you in the near future to make the arrangements." -  A single business sympathy card can become a meaningful gesture for someone in your office who is grieving.  It can be signed for all staff members, such as, "From the Staff of John Smith and Company."  Short, brief notes from individual staff members are also appropriate.   After the funeral and when things have settled down, call and visit the person who is grieving; perhaps even arrange to meet for lunch.  If they aren't ready for visitors or social events, try them again later.  When life has returned to normal for the rest of us, it is often during that time that the survivors need the most support and comfort.